Journey From Broken Hearts to Hearts Burning With Hope (Easter Meditation)

Text: Luke 24: 13- 35

Now on that same day two of them were going to a village called Emmaus, about seven miles from Jerusalem, and talking with each other about all these things that had happened. While they were talking and discussing, Jesus himself came near and went with them,  but their eyes were kept from recognizing him. And he said to them, “What are you discussing with each other while you walk along?” They stood still, looking sad. Then one of them, whose name was Cleopas, answered him, “Are you the only stranger in Jerusalem who does not know the things that have taken place there in these days?” He asked them, “What things?” They replied, “The things about Jesus of Nazareth, who was a prophet mighty in deed and word before God and all the people, and how our chief priests and leaders handed him over to be condemned to death and crucified him. But we had hoped that he was the one to redeem Israel. Yes, and besides all this, it is now the third day since these things took place. Moreover, some women of our group astounded us. They were at the tomb early this morning, and when they did not find his body there, they came back and told us that they had indeed seen a vision of angels who said that he was alive. Some of those who were with us went to the tomb and found it just as the women had said; but they did not see him.” Then he said to them, “Oh, how foolish you are, and how slow of heart to believe all that the prophets have declared! Was it not necessary that the Messiah should suffer these things and then enter into his glory?” Then beginning with Moses and all the prophets, he interpreted to them the things about himself in all the scriptures.

As they came near the village to which they were going, he walked ahead as if he were going on. But they urged him strongly, saying, “Stay with us, because it is almost evening and the day is now nearly over.” So he went in to stay with them. When he was at the table with them, he took bread, blessed and broke it, and gave it to them. Then their eyes were opened, and they recognized him; and he vanished from their sight. They said to each other, “Were not our hearts burning within us while he was talking to us on the road, while he was opening the scriptures to us?” That same hour they got up and returned to Jerusalem; and they found the eleven and their companions gathered together. 34 They were saying, “The Lord has risen indeed, and he has appeared to Simon!” Then they told what had happened on the road, and how he had been made known to them in the breaking of the bread.

Message:

The story of Resurrection stated above is a story of our lives. We are people on a journey. But with all the comforts that we have in our lives, there is one thing that we lack. It is hope that eludes us. The two disciples walking towards Emmaus is like any of us. It shows the Monday morning blues. The despair that we have. The questions that we ask. What is the purpose of life? Where is God in all this? Does my life really matter?  Look at what one of the disciples say. “But we had hoped that he was the one to redeem Israel.” (Luke 24: 20). It is the story of broken hopes and broken hearts. It is our everyday talk. “We had hope. Now we feel cheated.” “Things are never going to change. We have to accept it.” “We have to live with this hurt. We cannot dream anymore.” “I wanted this job but now I have reached a dead end. I do not see purpose in my life.” There have been moments in my life where despair had a better share. Hope was just a very fancy word. The Lord that I worshipped looked very distant and far. Resurrection seemed just a story.

There is a very popular comic strip called “Finding Waldo” which is full of graphic images. The task of the reader is to find a character called ‘Waldo’. But the fun part is it is very difficult to find Waldo. In the first page Waldo is very prominent and we can recognize it with ease. But as the pages are flipped the task gets very difficult. Part of the difficulty in finding Waldo is that he is very ordinary looking. Last page is the toughest as the room is full of counterfeit Waldos which distract us. Finding the original Waldo is the ordeal. The popularity of this comic strip has led this to be a very popular video game and apps on phone. The creator of this series is Martin Handford. He says he developed it “So that children are curious of their surroundings and explore the wonder around them.” We saw that finding Waldo in the initial pages is relatively easy but when one flips page it gets tough. Similarly in midst of despair and heart break where one has given up hope finding the presence of God is next to impossible. Everything looks very meaningless. We feel cheated. No explanation of faith looks meaningful.

It is in the context of pain and despair Jesus joins the 2 disciples who were totally shattered at the brutal event of crucifixion of Jesus. In midst of their pain and confusion Jesus walks with them. But they cannot recognize who he is. The presence of God eludes them. Waldo is hidden. Jesus listens to their predicament. Offers them companionship and gives them an ear. Their story of brokenness is important to him. These disciples did hear about the resurrection of Jesus but their hearts were too clouded to believe it. Resurrection looks like a joke. An absurd one. After listening to their story, Jesus speaks. It is like he walks with them and helps them to look at the scriptures.He interprets the Bible and gives them hope.  He showed them the purpose of the suffering of Christ. He introduced the promise of God. He assured them that death and suffering will not have the last word. There is hope. Resurrection is real.  When he is about to walk past these disciples, they call him to stay with them. At the table Jesus blesses the bread and breaks it. After that he gives it to them and their eyes were opened. Now they recognize Jesus. It is in the simple act of breaking of the bread that resurrection becomes real to them. This subtle encounter with the Risen Christ who walked with them in their pain transformed their broken hearts to burning hearts.  “Were not our hearts burning within us while he was talking to us on the road, while he was opening the scriptures to us?” (vs 32) After that they travelled to Jerusalem to give this message of hope and Resurrection.

William Bausch a Catholic priest narrates one of his experiences when a daughter of a man with cancer called him to pray with her father. When Wiliam Bausch reached to see the man suffering from cancer he saw that this man was lying on the bed and there was an empty chair next to him. So Fr William seeing the empty chair asked “Were you expecting me?” The man replied “No, who are you?” “My Name is Fr. William Bausch, the new Priest at your parish. Seeing the chair I thought you were expecting me.” The man who was bedridden answered “O the Chair, please close the door.” The priest got curious and closed it. “You know Father I always kept asking my priest about how to pray. He gave me all the answers that I never understood. One day he gave me a book by a Swiss theologian Hans Urs von Balthasar. This book was about prayer. I started to read and when I reached the second page, I had to look up the dictionary six times. With that I gave up. I was really in despair. With the cancer I found no comfort. Then one of my friends Joel told me that prayer is something simple. He asked me to ‘Take a chair and sit on it. Place an empty chair in front of you. In faith see Jesus on that chair. Remember he told the disciples I’ll be with you always.. Speak to Jesus. Feel his presence.’ You know Father first I felt that the advice was stupid. But when I started talking to the empty chair I actually felt the presence of Jesus. I felt him in the midst of my pain. His wounds were healing me. I have a peace that is beyond my physical condition. I may die but now I have hope.” William Bausch was deeply moved by this encounter. He urged the man to continue his practice. After two days he got a call from the daughter informing that her father was dead. She said “I found my father leaning on a chair having a smile on his face when I found him dead.”

My dear friends the message of resurrection is that we have hope. Our circumstance may depress us. We may feel lost. But Jesus is walking with us in this journey. He is listening to our prayers and our frustrations. In simple acts like prayers, reading the Bible and worshipping we can encounter him. He is walking next to us, transforming our broken hearts to hearts burning with zeal. He wants us to spread this message of hope. Resurrection is here. We did not find Waldo. Waldo found us.  Happy Easter.

Rev Merin Mathew

Mar Thoma Syrian Church

Guwahati

A Time to "Let Go" (Meditation for Maundy Thursday)

Text: Luke 22: 14- 20

When the hour came, he took his place at the table, and the apostles with him. He said to them, “I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer; for I tell you, I will not eat it[b] until it is fulfilled in the kingdom of God.” Then he took a cup, and after giving thanks he said, “Take this and divide it among yourselves;  for I tell you that from now on I will not drink of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes.” Then he took a loaf of bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body, which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of me.” And he did the same with the cup after supper, saying, “This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in my blood.

Message

As a child I remember the first time I went to the Circus. I was all excited to see the clowns, the lions, the tigers, the elephants, et al. But the time when my mouth was wide open with wonder was at the “Trapeze Act”. What is a Trapeze? A trapeze is a short horizontal bar hung by ropes or metal straps from a support. It is an aerial apparatus commonly found in circus performances. There are two set categories. The “Flyers” and the “Catchers.” The flyer climbs the steps, mounts the platform and grasps the trapeze that is suspended from the middle of the arena. The one doing this, leaps off the platform, holding the trapeze, swings through the air. While the catcher hangs from his knees on another trapeze, with his/her hands to reach out. The flyer has to let go the trapeze. She/he sails in midair with no support or connection. Some do a somersault or two. This act of letting go is a very risky one. The flyer has to completely trust the catcher to time accordingly and swing into action so that the catcher will hold the flyer. When I saw this, it was like “having my heart in my mouth” moment. Henri Nouwen a Dutch Catholic Priest interacted with trapeze artists. They said to him “The biggest challenge is to “let go” of the trapeze and trust that the catcher will hold before one descends to the ground. Letting go is an act of faith.

We saw Jesus having a great reception when he entered Jerusalem on a Donkey. He had the people on his side. In the passage set before us, we see Jesus at the table during the Passover. This is his final table fellowship with His disciples. John Ortberg says that table in Greek is called “Trapeza”. It is a time when Jesus like the flyers in Trapeze was about to “Let go” of his earthly life. He was walking towards the Cross. Jesus taught his disciples all through that meaning of life is not in clinging to certainties. Peter at Caesarea Philippi declared Jesus as Messiah but when Jesus spoke about suffering and cross that He had to endure, Peter took him to the side and rebuked him. Jesus harshly calls Peter “Get back Satan”. Peter wanted to cling on to Jesus. But Jesus taught life is to learn to ‘let go’ in faith. ‘Letting go’ is a challenge. “To let go” is the path of the cross. ‘To let go’ is to deny oneself and carry the cross and follow Jesus. Jesus lets go his life in Heaven and becomes a human. He lets go off his riches and was born in a manger. And now he is about to let go off his ministry and disciples. Before he lets his life go on the cross He prayed to the “Catcher”, ‘Father, into your hands I commend my Spirit.’ Passover meal celebrated the liberation of the Hebrew Slaves from Egypt. The meal reminded them of the deliverance of God. On the Passover table Jesus demonstrates His brokenness of the body and shedding of the blood through breaking the bread and distributing the wine. He made the “Letting go of the Cross” a memory to live by. Cross is a reality that needs to be inscribed in our lives. The Holy Communion is the reminder of the hope that if we ‘let go’ in faith, the ‘Catcher’ will hold us. 

We are burdened in life with regret. We are crippled by remorse. The sense of loss makes us bitter.  Despair makes us negative about all our experience. Revenge rules our mental landscapes. We see no hope. We cling on to all these things. Nurturing a sense of hurt is very difficult to let go. “To let go” our inferiority complex is very very difficult. If we hold on to it, we have an explanation for all the wrongs in our lives. If we let go, we have to have the faith that God is in control. It is easier to harbor hatred, revenge, guilt, feelings of hurt, than to let go. Strangely the negative things do give us a sense of control and letting them go makes us “helpless”. We have to have faith that God will hold us. He will not let us fall.

At an early age Sam lost his father due to an unfortunate circumstance. There were some people responsible for it. He grew up with hatred and a sense of revenge. But Sam was blessed with a devout mother who had faith in God and abandoned herself and her 4 children in the hands of God. She taught Sam the importance of faith and worship. When Sam became a youth the hatred deepened. The sense of revenge got louder. He was entrapped in the cage of regret, hatred and revenge. It affected his personality. He attended the worship and took part in the Holy Communion but he could never let go of his deep seated wounds. The only comfort was the love and prayer of his mother. Rev K.O. Philipose who was the Vicar of his church introduced him to the love and grace of Lord Jesus through his pastoral care. One day when he took part in the Holy Communion, Sam was moved by the words of Liturgy said by the priest before he administered the Holy Body and Blood. “The Holy Body and Holy Blood  of our Lord Jesus Christ, broken and shed on the cross for the forgiveness of sins, is given to you for the health of body and soul.” When he received the body and blood of Christ he remembers being moved beyond words. This encounter led him to experience the Cross and let go off his hatred, helplessness and revenge. It was this encounter that turned his life around where he let go and waited for God to catch him. It was this act of surrender that shaped his course of life. The brokenness of Jesus healed his deep seated wounds. The Blood of Christ washed his hatred and revenge. This story is the true story of my friend and mentor Rev Sam Koshy who is a blessed orator and Professor of Theology at the Mar Thoma Theological Seminary, Kottayam. My dear friends, the Holy Communion is not something magical. It is an invitation to ‘let go’ off our securities, insecurities, hatred, pain and revenge to increase our capacities to experience the Presence of God in our lives. 

Prayer: Lord forgive us.  We love to cling to our life and our circumstances. Train us to ‘let go’ to feel your presence and control in our lives. Amen

Rev Merin Mathew

Mar Thoma Syrian Church

Guwahati

In The Shadows of Good Friday, I Hear the 'Song of Lamech' (Why I Oppose Capital Punishment)

Text: Matthew 26: 47-56

While he was still speaking, Judas, one of the Twelve, arrived. With him was a large crowd armed with swords and clubs, sent from the chief priests and the elders of the people. Now the betrayer had arranged a signal with them: “The one I kiss is the man; arrest him.” Going at once to Jesus, Judas said, “Greetings, Rabbi!” and kissed him. Jesus replied, “Do what you came for, friend.” Then the men stepped forward, seized Jesus and arrested him. With that, one of Jesus’ companions reached for his sword, drew it out and struck the servant of the high priest, cutting off his ear. “Put your sword back in its place,” Jesus said to him, “for all who draw the sword will die by the sword. Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and he will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels? But how then would the Scriptures be fulfilled that say it must happen in this way?”

In that hour Jesus said to the crowd, “Am I leading a rebellion, that you have come out with swords and clubs to capture me? Every day I sat in the temple courts teaching, and you did not arrest me. But this has all taken place that the writings of the prophets might be fulfilled.” Then all the disciples deserted him and fled.

Message

Before we get to the text let me introduce you to Kenneth Bailey. He is a Scholar of New Testament who worked extensively with the Bedouin Tribe of Palestine. His hypothesis is that this tribe in the contemporary world is representative of the ethos of the audience that Jesus spoke to, and engaged with. This gave an idea of how people reacted to the teachings and actions of Jesus.  Kenneth told them many stories of Jesus and stories told by Jesus. Bedouins loved stories and they always gathered around bonfire to listen to them. There was something significant about their listening. They were not passive listeners like we find in many of our churches. If they loved something about the story they would raise both their hands and wave it. I wish we had such a practice in our churches. At least I would be assured that I did not put people to sleep. Now is the interesting part and I would prefer people sleeping than doing this. If they did not like some aspects of the story they would express their displeasure . How? They would start to spit together into the bonfire. (If this was a practice in the churches where people were allowed to participate in the sermon in this way, I am sure our churches would be flooded. Grouse thought). Kenneth says that in his narration of the parable of the Prodigal Son the listeners started spitting fiercely when he told that the father was ready to accept the wayward son and give a feast on his return. They felt that honor is everything and the son brought disgrace and was fit for being publicly stoned. Revenge had to be taken and forgiveness was cowardice.  But shortly the listeners started to wave vigorously in the air. Take a guess when that was. It was when they heard about the protest of the elder son who had disdain for the father for accepting a loser of a son and if that was not enough he was giving a feast in celebration. The elder son who had revenge in his heart was the ideal. Honour is prime. Revenge is imperative.

I am imagining that had the Beduion tribe heard the passage that is set before us, they would have waved vigorously at the act of bravery of the disciple who cut the ear of the soldier who dared to arrest his master. John 18: 10 says ‘Then Simon Peter, who had a sword, drew it and struck the high priest’s servant, cutting off his right ear. (The servant’s name was Malchus.)’. So we know that the disciple in question is Peter. So Peter did something commendable in the eyes of the viewers or listeners but Jesus reprimanded him. His ethics and response was not of honour or revenge. And this he had made it very clear to Peter. For this we have to take a flash back. There was a time when Peter went to Jesus with a question

 “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”

Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times." (Matthew 18: 21-22). Peter had an assumption that there is a limit to forgive. The Rabbis of his time taught one could forgive a person three times. So Peter asking 7 times was a very generous question. But Jesus said one has to forgive seventy times seven (that makes it 490 times). Interesting. Now let me introduce you to one more passage.

Lamech said to his wives, “Adah and Zillah, listen to me; wives of Lamech, hear my words:

I have killed a man for wounding me,

a young man for injuring me.

If Cain is avenged seven times,

then Lamech seventy-seven times. (Genesis 4.23-24)

This passage is called the Song of Lamech. This song is a song of vengeance. Richard Beck says when Jesus told Peter “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times", he was refuting the logic of vengeance in the Song of Lamech where it is said “If Cain is avenged seven times,

then Lamech seventy-seven times. ”

 It was the Song of Vengeance that Jesus challenged. At the time of arrest of Jesus the Song of Lamech appealed to Peter more than the Song of Forgiveness. This is where we can see the passionate plea of Jesus screaming in disgust “Put your sword back in its place.” And then we hear his declaration that challenges the culture of violence that was prevalent in his time, “ For all who draw the sword will die by the sword.” Jesus showed on his journey to the Cross that forgiveness was more scandalous than vengeance.

My dear friends, we live in a time where “The Song of Vengeance” is more popular than the “Song of Forgiveness.” I remember that the people all over India were enraged in reaction to the Delhi rape case where a girl was brutally raped and eventually murdered. This outrage led to people wanting instant justice where the accused be instantly  given capital punishment. Facebook and Internet was flooded with violent images of Syria, Lebanon, Saudi Arabia where criminals were publicly executed or tortured. This was seen as the apt response. ‘The Song of Lamech’ was even more popular than the iconic ‘Gangnam Stye’. It is interesting to note that before Ajmal Kasab was hanged, in 2010 there was a Video Game developed called ‘Hang Kasab’ which gave the gamers an opportunity to hang Kasab vicariously through the video game. It was interesting to note that The Gamer Company promoted it by saying “Show your Patriotism. Hang Kasab.” It is noted that after the event of Hanging Kasab, this game was the most popular game online with maximum hits and usages. It was so popular that Android had a mobile app for the same. ‘The Song of Lamech’ has its own appeal. India again showed its credentials by secretly hanging Afzal Guru. This too was celebrated in many quarters. Song of Lamech is blaring in the air

In the shadows of Good Friday let us remember that “Crucifixion of an Innocent Man” was celebrated by the people who shouted the Song of Lamech “Crucify Him, Crucify Him.” The public thought that justice was done when a rebel who taught dangerous ideas like grace and forgiveness was put to the cross.But Jesus sang the Song of Forgiveness on the Cross "“Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.” (Luke 23: 34). As a Disciple of Jesus I too denounce the ‘Song of Lamech.’ I am against Capital Punishment where the State has the right to Murder. This is the victory of ‘Song of Lamech.’ I am siding something very dangerous and scandalous. I sing the ‘Song of Forgiveness’. The challenge is daunting. It seems impractical and foolish. Are we foolish enough to expand our minds and hearts to embrace forgiveness? It is a very arduous journey. May the Song of Forgiveness sung by Jesus bring harmony to our lives. 

Rev Merin Mathew

Mar Thoma Syrian Church

Guwahati

Hosanna "Lord, Save Us From Our Self-Love"

Text: Matthew 21: 1-11

When they had come near Jerusalem and had reached Bethphage, at the Mount of Olives, Jesus sent two disciples, saying to them, “Go into the village ahead of you, and immediately you will find a donkey tied, and a colt with her; untie them and bring them to me. If anyone says anything to you, just say this, ‘The Lord needs them.’ And he will send them immediately.” This took place to fulfill what had been spoken through the prophet, saying,“Tell the daughter of Zion,Look, your king is coming to you,humble, and mounted on a donkey and on a colt, the foal of a donkey.”The disciples went and did as Jesus had directed them; they brought the donkey and the colt, and put their cloaks on them, and he sat on them. A very large crowd spread their cloaks on the road, and others cut branches from the trees and spread them on the road. The crowds that went ahead of him and that followed were shouting, “Hosanna to the Son of David! Blessed is the one who comes in the name of the Lord! Hosanna in the highest heaven!”When he entered Jerusalem, the whole city was in turmoil, asking, “Who is this?” The crowds were saying, “This is the prophet Jesus from Nazareth in Galilee

Message

Matt Redman is an English Christian Worship leader. He mentions of a time when he was just entertaining and not worshipping. People came and thanked him and he felt this was not worship. He consulted his pastor. His pastor said that they would try a season to do away with the sound system and the guitars. He said “let people come to the Church with their voices and prayers to worship Jesus.” Let Jesus be the focus. The pastor reminded “Let us be producers of Worship and not just consumers.” After a season devoid of guitars and sound system the Church set their focus on following and worshipping Jesus. It is in such a background Redman composed one of the most amazing and meaningful songs “When the Music fades..”. For those who are unfamiliar with the song here is a snippet.

‘When the music fades, all is stripped away, and I simply come / Longing just to bring something that’s of worth that will bless your heart… / I’m coming back to the heart of worship, and it’s all about You, Jesus.’

When we look at the text we see a juncture in Jesus ministry where he was at the zenith of popularity. People were crowding to see Jesus enter Jerusalem where they spread their cloaks to welcome Jesus coming riding on a Donkey. They were all shouting Hosanna. Hosanna means save us now. Save us from what? If we were to be in place of the people in Jerusalem, if we said Hosanna, what would it mean? Save us from what?

The people who gathered to welcome Jesus were not welcoming the Son of God. He was a political Messiah who they thought would save Israelites from the strong hold of Roman Imperialism. The background of this event was Passover which celebrated Israel’s freedom from Egypt and the clutches of Pharaoh. In such a context, the freedom from Roman Imperialism was envisaged.  The crowd followed a Miracle Maker. He was doing wonders. He is a superstar. They will benefit if he continues. Jesus was their hero who assured them security and hope. When one reads John Chapter 6, we see a prelude to this. When Jesus feeds the Five thousand people throng to make him the king. But when Jesus sits down and teaches his ways we have people deserting him one by one. At this day when people sing Hosanna, the whole city is with him. He has men and woman on his side. But when we fast forward it to the Calvary we see Jesus lonely on the Cross. Where did the people go? Where did the people who removed their cloak and spread it on the ground to welcome Jesus go?

Philip Yancey says that our journey of faith is divided into 3 stages. A)Childhood, B)Adulthood and C)Parenthood.

He says that in our faith journey we develop a childlike faith. We have wonder in our eyes. We have faith and we expect that all things will be fine. God will take care of us and he will protect us. This innocence of the faith is very important. It is this faith that keeps us going. We believe in miracles. But this faith focuses on what good can God do to me? What am I receiving? I am the most important entity.

Adulthood of faith is when we are not convinced about many things. We doubt some understandings of faith. We rebel. We question. We are not satisfied with the answers. We have doubts. We have genuine questions about existence of God. We are not sure if our faith makes sense at all. This is an important part of faith journey. There is space for doubt in our journey of faith. I remember my own rebellions where I questioned the need for church, the need for faith, the need for liturgy. There were times when I found the worship so boring that inside the worship order I kept another book so that I could read it. I strictly do not advocate this but my period of rebellion and questioning were very maturely handled by my parents.

Parenthood is that stage in faith when the focus is not I. I grow to get over my self-obsession. I learn that life is all about giving. My parents always sacrificed for me, they had sleepless nights when I was ill, they had confusions about my choices. But their prayer was that I do things pleasing to the Lord.” My child should have what I did not have and my child should grow like I never could” is the wish of a parent. Parent stage of faith is when we practice what Jesus asked ““If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.”(Luke 9: 23) I remember that when I was struggling with all my doubts and questions I encountered a special man. I was so obsessed with my act of rebellion that I did not see any hope. I met Dax Mathews at Kamshet Mission Field, which is popularly known as Lonavala Mission. Dax embodies a life of sacrifice and faith. Before joining Maharashtra Village Mission, he was helping tribal communities with livelihood issues by teaching them different techniques of agriculture. He realized that denying oneself and taking up the Cross means to serve people more disadvantaged than us. A person who grew up in urban background went to the villages of Maharashtra and lived with minimum comforts. His only aim was to serve people. Dax does not speak much. He looks very ordinary. But his actions and his convictions have helped me to understand that Faith is about giving, it is about sacrificing and displacing myself from the pedestal of life. Dax today is doing his Bachelors in Divinity from Dharmajyothi Vidyapeeth. His teachers and classmates alike bear witness to the uniqueness of his conviction and passion for mission.

Now to the question where did the people go who sang ‘Hosanna.’ Well they quit as the road to the cross is about denying ourselves. They went away sad like the Rich young man who loved eternal life but could not sell his riches. We also want to follow Christ as long as we get something and how good if we could just avoid the cross. We want Christianity without the Cross.

As a Child, I first saw the game of lemon and spoon in Sunday school. I loved it. In normal athletics I never failed to come last. So here was my sure road to success. Lemon and spoon was slow and I knew I could make it. The race was about to begin. The whistle blew. We with the spoon in our mouth and lemon on top of it, started to race towards the finishing line. As I had hoped I was the first one to reach the mark. I must have done celebrations that could put Usain Bolt to shame. But the man at the finishing line seemed to ignore me. He told me to stand aside. I thought to myself, this man does not know how to appreciate a winner. But before I could start rejoicing again, the Sunday school teacher announced the name of the winners and she forgot to take my name. Or so I thought. I am sure you must have guessed it. I was the first one to reach. But my spoon had no lemon. In my craze to come first i ran fast but had lost the the most important thing. I had lost the lemon

We live in a time where getting ahead of others is important. Success is about getting ahead of others. Religion is about gaining divine favour. Where more than serving others it is more important to know who will go to heaven, who is born again and who is the chosen one. We have finished the race. But we have lost the lemon. 

Hosanna “Lord Save us from our Self-love”. Amen

Rev Merin Mathew

Mar Thoma Syrian Church

Guwahati

Facebook Confessions and the Thirst for Grace

Text: Luke 19: 1-9

He entered Jericho and was passing through it. A man was there named Zacchaeus; he was a chief tax collector and was rich. He was trying to see who Jesus was, but on account of the crowd he could not, because he was short in stature. So he ran ahead and climbed a sycamore tree to see him, because he was going to pass that way. When Jesus came to the place, he looked up and said to him, “Zacchaeus, hurry and come down; for I must stay at your house today.” So he hurried down and was happy to welcome him. All who saw it began to grumble and said, “He has gone to be the guest of one who is a sinner.” Zacchaeus stood there and said to the Lord, “Look, half of my possessions, Lord, I will give to the poor; and if I have defrauded anyone of anything, I will pay back four times as much.” Then Jesus said to him, “Today salvation has come to this house, because he too is a son of Abraham.

Message

For the past one week I have witnessed the mushrooming of  ‘Campus Confessions’ on Facebook where groups linked to schools and universities have an opportunity to be anonymous and confess anything possible. I saw one group that invited in this way "You have a dark secret? You want to get it out of your system. You have come to the right place. Confess as much as you like without being known." This trend has alarmed the police, college and school administration alike. But it is a big rage among the teenagers and youths. The reports of ‘Times of India ‘says that this trend is here to stay which and has helped Facebook to get an edge over Tumblr. Psychologists say that it is a very urgent need for people to have a forum for Catharsis. These pages of campus confessions give opportunity to people to remain hidden. But why do people have the urge to confess? Counselors say that the human heart can’t deal with the guilt of secret shame. Such forums give them the comfort of confessing their guilt with a guarantee of not being judged. They crave to confess their hidden aspect of the self.

In this context we see Luke introducing a person who preferred being hidden. In a place called Jericho he tells us about a Tax Collector called Zacchaeus . The story of the short man Zachy was my favorite story as a kid. A cartoon illustration of Zachhaeus climbing the Sycamore tree is still fresh in my mind. To understand why Zachy loved to hide we need to learn a bit of the background of Israel. John Ortberg says that there were few professions in Israel that were considered immoral. They were Gamblers with Dice, Usurers, Pigeon Trainers (as Pigeon racing was a form of gambling) and Tax collectors. Now why the Tax collectors profession was considered immoral? One would know that Israel was under Roman Imperialism and extracting money out of their colony was a main stay of Roman system. One of the historical document has an edict which says “Do not appoint Roman tax Collectors. Let Barbarians be the tax Collectors.” Let me divert a bit before we go further. How did the word Barbarian come to be used? Kancha Iliah a dalit Scholar says that Greeks and Romans were the first to invent the technology of shaving. Therefore if one looks at any Greek or Roman Statue, the alpha male is one who is “Clean Shave Gillette” look. Since only Romans had the access to the technology of shaving only they had the clean shave privilege but the people of the Countries under their imperial rule had long flowing beard. Now in latin “Barba” means beard. So Barbarians simply mean people with beard. So technically I am a Barbarian. How Nice. Well it is the politics of the language that associated barbarians with being uncivilized.

Coming back to the point is that Barbarian Zachy was a Tax Collector who was also seen as an agent of the Romans. Zachy was despised as a traitor by society at large. A devout Israelite would not let the hem of their robe to be touched by a tax collector. One can say that Zacchaeus with his short physical frame thought that only money could bring him prominence and security. He was good at it and also that he must have been totally corrupt by fleecing people. The money is there, he was the chief tax collector, he had huge power. But then why did this man want to see Jesus? John Ortberg says that he was intrigued by Jesus as this Jesus had a Tax Collector as a Disciple (we are talking about Matthew). That was a huge message for this person who was a social scum. He did not want to be seen in public. But he also did not want to miss meeting this Rabbi who has a man from his profession as a disciple. His urge to be hidden was so deep that he wanted to see Jesus from a distance and therefore he climbed the tree. He did not want to face people along with Jesus, whom Zacchaeus had cheated. Jesus comes closer to the tree and Zacchaeus gets a closer look. But when he is looking at Jesus, Jesus looks at him. He stops. Guess what? Jesus not only calls him, He also knows his name. He calls out  “Zacchaeus, hurry and come down; for I must stay at your house today.” (vs 6) The people are shocked that Jesus calls out a corrupt traitor who is a tax collector. Vs 7 says that people walking with Jesus are unhappy and start to grumble that he is going to dine with a sinner. How can Jesus do that? Does he not know his background? What is funny is, the people who were walking with Jesus were more spiritual that Jesus was. I feel that people in the church reject people that Jesus would accept. It seems we are more spiritual than Him.

Zacchaeus knows that his life does not measure up to have a communion with Jesus. But he now encounters Grace that he never has seen . He was a misfit till now. Lived in guilt and always felt literally and metaphorically short in front of people. When he encounters grace, his hidden aspects of the soul are touched. His hidden sinfulness becomes exposed in front of Jesus who comes to his home without any preconditions. Coming home and dining made him feel accepted. The power of grace opened his heart that he not only confessed his sins but also was ready to pay back four times the amount to those he had defrauded. According to law he just had to pay back 20 percent. His repentance produced generosity which was hidden due to his guilt. He realized he was blind in his urge to become rich and therefore decided to give half of his possessions to the poor. We can see all the people who with reluctance accompanied Jesus to a fraud tax collectors home. When Zacchaeus said all this they might have wished that Jesus sees through the fake claims of a tax collector who can never be honest. But they get scandalized hearing Jesus say “Today salvation has come to this house, because he too is a son of Abraham.” (vs 9) Salvation? Son of Abraham? They had too much to take for a day. But Zacchaeus because of the Grace received from Jesus Christ, was healed and received forgiveness and transformed his life of hiddenness to walk with Jesus. He received salvation.

Today as followers of Christ we have become too judgmental in our approach. We have become more pious and Spiritual than Jesus. Our Church is restricted to the Believers. There are many inside and outside the church that need the grace to come out of their hidden ways of life. But we have chosen to be judgmental so as to exclude them.

I will end the meditation with the famous Story of Ernest Hemingway that sums up the urgent need for grace and forgiveness. In his short story “Capital of the World”, Ernest Hemingway tells about a Spanish father who wanted to be reconciled with his runaway son. The despairing father missed his son so much that he placed an advertisement in the local newspaper. The advertisement read simply, “Paco, meet me at the Hotel Montana at noon on Tuesday. All is forgiven! Love, Papa.”  The father drove down and was anxious whether his son Paco would meet him. He was not sure. With a million thoughts, the Father reaches the Hotel. But the father was shocked at what he saw. There were eight hundred young men named Paco waiting for their forgiving fathers! Paco is a very common name in Spain.

We all long to be forgiven and experience grace. Confession here is when Jesus has taken the initiative to reach out to us. To give communion to us. He accepts us the way we are.  We do not need to remain hidden. His Grace transforms us. He has reached out to us so that we can reach out to many spreading Grace, Forgiveness and Reconciliation.

Rev Merin Mathew

Mar Thoma Syrian Church

Guwahati

What's On Your Mind?

Text: Philippians 4: 8

Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Message

The more I read this Bible verse, the more I am in awe of Paul. He is writing this passage languishing in a prison where the hope of release looks very bleak. He is aware of his death and getting ready for it. In midst of that he exhorts the Church of Philippi. Paul certainly was a man who had too many discouraging things happening in his life. He had opponents who hated him. There were people who thought he was useless. There were people who even made fun of his appearance and speeches. Take a look at this. ‘For some say, "His letters are weighty and forceful, but in person he is unimpressive and his speaking amounts to nothing."’ (2 Corinthians 10: 10) In midst of all such negativity how did he manage to have so much hope? Not only that, he also gave hope to people around him.

Facebook had a patent question that it asked “What’s On your mind?” In short it was asking what you are thinking about. Did you know that the average person has 10,000 separate thoughts each day? That works out to be 3.5 million thoughts a year. If you live to be 75, you will have over 26 million different thoughts. Already most of you have had over 2,000 separate thoughts since you got out of bed this morning. You’ll probably have another 8,000 before you go to bed tonight. Then you’ll start all over again tomorrow. Every one of those 10,000 thoughts represents a choice you make, a decision to think about this, and not about that. So what gets clear is that thinking is a choice. But it is also true that our thinking gets influenced by the people and circumstances around us. There are many circumstances that discourage us. We face rejection, people call us useless. When we look around we feel out of place. We hear voices like “I am not good enough. I am not fair. I am not intelligent. I am never going to succeed. Nobody loves me” These are the range of voices that go on buzzing in your head. It pulls you back. It makes you fear taking a risk. You are afraid of falling. Everything looks very tough.

Let me share a small parable. There once was a bunch of tiny frogs who arranged a climbing competition. The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower.A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants. The race began. No one in the crowd really believed the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower.Heard throughout the race were statements such as, “Oh, way too difficult”, “They will never make it to the top”, “Not a chance they will succeed”, and “The tower is too high”.The tiny frogs began collapsing, one by one - except for those who, in a fresh tempo, were climbing higher and higher. The crowd continued to yell, “It is too difficult! No one will make it”!More tiny frogs got tired and gave up. But one continued to climb higher and higher. This one refused to give up!At the end of the race, all had given up climbing the tower except for the one tiny frog who, after a big effort, was the only one who reached the top!All of the other tiny frogs wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it. They asked him how he had found the strength to succeed and reach the goal. It turned out that the winning frog was deaf!

Now it is not possible for us to turn deaf to what people say. Neither can you avoid negative thoughts. Because the more you avoid negative thoughts, it becomes more prominent. Try telling yourself “I am not going to think about red.” The more the color red will pop up. So Paul says instead of avoiding negative thoughts, just hear a different voice. The voice of the Lord. Once when Paul complained about an ailment to God and asked him three times to get cured he heard the Voice of God saying ““My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12: 9). This is why memorizing Bible Verses is so powerful. I had all kinds of negative thoughts before writing my Marathi paper in standard Eight. My head was full of the voice of my teacher who ridiculed me as I had failed in her subject. I just did not know what to do. This voice just stuck with me. There is when my mother told me to read Psalms 91. “Whoever goes to the Lord for safety, whoever remains under the protection of the Almighty, can say to him, you are my defender and protector, You are my God, in You I trust…..” That was the voice that helped me sail through. I did not avoid a negative voice, I heard a different voice.

I will end this meditation with a story that has transformed me. Before going to Seminary as a pre- Seminary training, I was assigned to Navjeevan Centre, Mumbai. The special task that I was assigned by the director Rev. Dr. Moni Mathew, was to teach the 16 children who were preparing for their Standard 10th exams. This was exciting as I had to teach History, Economics, Business Studies and English along with Roshen George and Koshy Kurian. Before the exams there was an aptitude test arranged for these 16 children. I was with the Psychiatrist and Psychologist when they did the test. All the feedback was given to me. It quantified how successful a candidate would be in clearing the 10th Standard exam. Out of that, one boy Prakash was given the lowest marks. The Psychologist made it very clear that “He is not a good choice for academics. He will not do well. Be prepared that if he appears he may fail in all the subjects. He just does not have the aptitude.” My heart sank. I shared the results with Moni Achen. He said “Prakash will write the exam. These are tests. It may be wrong.  Do not tell this to him. If he knows this he may be discouraged. You just encourage. If he fails, it is ok. I will take care of that.” Honestly it was very tough teaching Prakash. He took time to understand. But he was the most sincere among the 16. He woke up every day at 3:45 AM. He studied. He had many doubts. He kept asking all of us. He told me “It is very tough. I do not understand a lot of things. But I am praying. I am trying my best.” There were days Prakash felt discouraged but he kept trying. The day of exams came. One after the other exams was getting over. We all were worried about how the children would fair. This exam allowed failure in 2 subjects. So I was hoping atleast that they should achieve. The result was out in July when I was in Seminary. The first result I asked Koshy was about Prakash. I expected the worst. I prayed for the best. He had passed in every single subject. Yes. Prakash had passed in every single subject. I just could not believe my ears. Tears flowed. I am still misty eyed writing this. Prakash had too many things against him. But he believed in God. He tried his best.

I have myself been a slave of other peoples’ opinion. Do not get me wrong, the friends who have critiqued me have helped me grow. But there are way too many things that pull you down. There are many stereotypes that we need to subscribe. Let nobody else decide what you can or cannot do. Hear the Voice of God who has created you. Let his voice guide you on. So my dear friends’ whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.’ Amen

Rev Merin Mathew

Mar Thoma Syrian Church

Guwahati

What's On Your Mind God? Why Oh Why?

Text: Job 2: 11- 3: 4

When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him.  When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads.  Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.

After this, Job opened his mouth and cursed the day of his birth. He said:

“May the day of my birth perish,

 and the night that said, ‘A boy is conceived!’ That day—may it turn to darkness;

 may God above not care about it;

 may no light shine on it.

Message:

My wife and I have been deeply disturbed at the course of events that have taken place recently. Robinson Philip, member of my home parish, Immanuel Mar Thoma Church, Vishrantwadi, husband of Soji’s cousin and my church friend Tincy, passed away in a bike accident. This news literally shattered us. I just could not believe it’s true. How could God be so unfair was my first reaction. They have a 11 month old child who was the apple of their eyes. All the people who knew Tincy and know the wonderful person she is felt the pain as their own. Many of my friends asked me over Whatsapp and Facebook, “Why did God do this?” This was my question too. The pain of an unmerited suffering. Tincy had lost her mother and sister. She was finding great bliss in this marriage. I still remember the day when Robinson and Tincy came to wish me after my ordination. Robinson was very clear about his admiration for Tincy. He told us “I am very lucky to have married Tincy. With her in my life, I pray, I read the Bible and experience the joy of knowing God.” At that time Tincy blushed in embarrassment. Soji and I have enjoyed some good moments with them when we visited Pune. It pains us to think of Evan and Tincy. It is in this context that I read John Ortberg’s  ‘God Is Closer Than You Think’ and Philip Yancey’s “The Bible Jesus Read.”

Let us now look at the passage in front of us. I personally feel that the message of the book of Job has been lost in just reading chapter’s 1 and 2. Till here it is a story of a man who has lost his children, his property, his health and literally everything but still does not complain. What great faith. His statement “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return there, The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away, Blessed be the name of the Lord.” (Job 1: 21) has given a lot of people strength to look at pain in a different light. Even when his wife asks him to Curse God and die, he continues his faith. Now enter the 3 friends of Job who heard the calamity of Job. Seeing Job the ones who came to console wept aloud. Job’s pain became their pain. Job 2: 13 is very powerful where it says ‘Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.’ Imagine sitting with someone saying nothing for seven days. These friends were mourning with Job. This is what Paul says in Romans 12: 15 “Mourn with Those who mourn….” Ortberg says Paul is not asking us to ‘find an explanation to give them why they are suffering’ or ‘Remind them everything is going to be ok, so they can stop crying now’. He asks us to cry with the ones who are crying. That is what the friends of Job did. They gave him the ‘Gift of Silence’. They were with him. I personally believe that being silent and available is the best way of being with the people who have suffered a loss. I remember delivering two sermons in the context of death. I am sure it did not comfort the mourners. What it did was, it deeply disturbed me. My words were hollow and the hope I was giving was shallow. ‘The best way to meditate God’s presence to someone who is suffering is to sit with them in silence.’ And now we turn to Chapter 3. Here Job breaks the silence. He says “God gives, God takes, Blessed be the name of God.’ Well that is not what he says. He says “May the day of my birth perish,  and the night that said, ‘A boy is conceived!’ That day—may it turn to darkness;  may God above not care about it; may no light shine on it.” (Job 3: 3-4). Shocking. He is actually cursing the life that he has. He is now complaining. If we read Job Chapter 3- 37, the major portion shows the complaints of Job. How is that possible? How can a faithful man complain? When one reads the Book of Psalms, we see that the Hebrew name of Psalms is Tehellim which means Praises but the single most largest category of Psalms is not that of Thanksgiving, but that of Complaining. There is no parallel to this in any other religion. Prophets complain to God, Lamentations as a book is full of complaints. Job complains in his desperation. God gives us that freedom. On the Cross Jesus also complains “My God, My God why have you forsaken me”. I am sure Tincy has a lot to complain and she should. That is her freedom. I too, am complaining. I have the right to. We do not believe in a God who is distant from his creation. We believe in a God who on the cross suffered with the creation.

What does his 3 friends along with the fourth one Elihu do? They assume to speak for God. They try to tell Job that he is suffering because of some hidden sin that he has not confessed and that is why a Just God has punished you. These friends are like the modern day Evangelists found on TV. When 2 Aeroplanes destroyed World Trade Centre on 9/11, the Tele-evengelists said that “God was punishing America for the sins of gays and lesbians.” When the recent Newtown Connecticut School shootout took place where many children lost their lives we had friends of Job raisng their voices through evangelists saying “One can expect such things if you drive God out of schools. How can he protect them?” I feel nothing is more violent than to pretend to be God. I met a man who had lost his son 3 months ago. He told me “People say ‘God gives trouble and pain to those whom he loves the most. He gives pain only to those who can handle the pain.’ They are just trying to console me. I can’t handle this pain’. In our best intentions we try to make sense by saying good words. But being with the people and praying is the most important thing.

With Tincy, Soji and I along with all the possible well-wishers and friends, grieve the death of Robinson. He was a wonderful human being, and he lives on through Evan and the memories of friendship that he has left behind. Tincy, we promise to be with you. We too do not understand why this happened. But we pray that Jesus who defeated death at the cross through Resurrection, will unite us to him again on that Beautiful shore. Amen.

P.S. Job is a Fabulous Book which deals with the issue of an innocent man suffering. I would urge you to read Job Chapter 38-41. It is simply beautiful.

Rev Merin Mathew

Mar Thoma Syrian Church

Guwahati

You Fool??? Did I Hear That Right???

Text: Luke 12: 13- 21

Someone in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.” Jesus replied, “Man, who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?”  Then he said to them, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.”

And he told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man yielded an abundant harvest.  He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’

  “Then he said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store my surplus grain.  And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of grain laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.”’

  “But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’

  “This is how it will be with whoever stores up things for themselves but is not rich toward God.”

Message

Let me begin this with a contemporary parable that has given me a lot of perspective. A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the coffee.When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups have been taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.

Be assured that the cup itself adds no quality to the coffee. In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups... And then you began eyeing each other's cups.

Now consider this: Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, and the type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of life we live.

Keeping this parable in perspective let us look at our Biblical passage set in front of us. Jesus is asked to be an arbiter of a case where we have two brothers warring over an inheritance. In response to this request Jesus narrates the Parable of the Rich Fool. What exactly was wrong with this man? Was he a sinner? Did he abuse his wife? Did he cheat? I guess the answer is not that easy. It looks like he was a man who had a lot of things going well for him. He was focused on the harvest that had brought bonus to his life. He was a man who was building his riches on possessions. He was celebrating on the riches that he had. His future was secure. Life was a song. But then when everything is right God calls him a fool. Fool? Why? He was the man that the world would love to know. He would be the first one to be called to our parties. He would be one of those who we would request to inaugurate our establishments. He would be a very important person in our Church and Committee.

Many of us are very particular about our lifestyles. Many I know are very focused about their careers. The cars and phones we have, display our success. The locality in which we live is a testimony of the influence that we have. The home we have is the trophy of our dedication in pursuit of security and prestige. The Wedding receptions we hold shout out the clout we have. To get here we work 16 hours. Get into overtime. Get into loans after loans. We try to fit in. In this chase we have no time for God, for family and friends. In the name of doing it for family, one gets even more far from family. Husband has no time for wife and vice versa. Both have no time for children. No time for people around. Life is just a mad race to get somewhere. If one can identify with any of the above, God is saying to you“You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?”  Now, that sounds rude! We are very used to seeing Jesus comforting us. But the truth is, He confronted many a people.  Now He is confronting you. He is asking you some very disturbing questions. Talmud the interpretation of the Torah(First 5 Books of the Bible) says “One should repent the previous day one is going to die.” Then the question is how one knows when we are going to die. The answer in it is “Live like today is your last day.” This is a parable that asks us to reset our priorities. Are we rich towards God? Are we investing in relation and people that have eternal value? Where do we stand?

I will end with a story. Once there was a clergy. He had a visitor from the United States. They were meeting for the first time. The man and his wife gifted the Clergy a gold coin. The Clergy refused. He said “I cannot accept this.” The woman said “Achen you have to.” Then she narrated a story. “When your mother Simoni was  teacher in Anjal (a small village in Kerala) we lived in your neighbourhood. Your mother was a very prayerful woman. She was available for everyone. I had finished by matriculation (10th grade) and wished to go for nursing. My family was very poor and had no source to help me accomplish my dream. But my parents approached your mother who was fondly called as Simoni Teacher. When my father expressed our predicament, this lady of 7 children did not think twice. She removed her gold locket and gave it to my father. It is because of that great gesture I could study further and become a nurse. That is how I got a Job in the U.S. Today I have come back to return that Gold Locket with gratitude to God and your mother..”  This Simoni teacher died in Anjal itself in 1961. But her deed lived on. She invested in people. She was rich toward God and her richness was the relationships that are eternal. Her witness was this Nurse who could live her dream because this Simoni teacher was ready to sacrifice her riches. My dear friends it is time to review our attitude towards God. It is time to examine our spirituality. Are we investing in people? Is our money, our possessions instrumental in realizing the dreams of students who do not have the means to do so? Are we people with a social conscience? May God help us to set our priorities. May we hear God saying “Good and faithful Servant…..”

P.S. Simoni teacher is my paternal Grand Mother. (My father lost his mother when he was 8 yrs old and the youngest of the siblings was 1 and a half years). The Clergy in the story is my uncle Rev Dr George Mathew, Kuttiyil, who has dedicated a Scholarship in the Mar Thoma Seminary in the name of Simoni Mathew to make her investment an eternal one. 

Rev Merin Mathew

Mar Thoma Syrian Church

Guwahati

Just Chill??? No..Be Still

Text: Psalms 46: 10

He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;

    I will be exalted among the nations,

    I will be exalted in the earth.”

Message:

My mother says that the word that I used the most when I was a child is “Bore Adikyuvaa” (I am getting bored). I just could not sit in one place. It was a nightmare for her to take me to church as I found ‘sitting still’ impossible. Instead of Worshipping God, she was busy policing me. She says “Whenever I used to take you to church, due to exhaustion, the next day I would inevitably fall ill.” ‘Being still’ was an art I knew nothing about. But I realize that this word ‘Bore’ has gained currency in a time when there are so many options that cater to release us from our boredom. But when we look back there is no word for boredom in ancient or Biblical Greek. Some suggest that this word came into English dictionary only after the Industrial Revolution. In a world of smartphones, ipods, ipads, micro-slim televisions and play stations we have learnt the art of getting bored. Why so? It is said that the man today has become so distant from himself that he dreads being alone or doing nothing. The culture around has put so much emphasis on ‘doing’ that 'doing nothing' is wasting time. Sitting still is unproductive. You need to perform. You need to prove yourself. This emphasis on activity and productivity is what has made us look at old age, disability, and sickness with such dread and disdain. Humans are sadly being defined by what they produce and not by “Who they are”.

But what happens to people if they are alone or they are in solitude. Psychologist Mihalyi Csiksentmihalyi (pronounced as chick-sent-me-high) has done research on people where people are asked to set their alarm on a random time when they are alone. People are asked to write what they are thinking, doing or feeling when that happens. His conclusion on how people respond to being alone and still is very revealing. “When people are left alone, undistracted by noise or activity, their mind naturally drifts toward an awareness of discontent, a sense of inadequacy, anxiety about the future, and a chronic sense of self- preoccupation. Contrary to what we tend to assume, the normal state of the mind is chaos. When we are left alone, with demands on attention, the basic disorder of the mind reveals itself. With nothing to do, it begins to follow random patterns, usually stopping to consider something painful or disturbing.” He further adds “To avoid this condition, people are naturally eager to fill their minds with whatever information is readily available, as long as it distracts attention from turning inward and dwelling on negative feelings. This explains why such a huge proportion of time is invested in watching television, despite the fact that it is rarely enjoyed.” If this diagnosis is precise which I feel is true, then our greatest fear is to be with ourselves. We do not avoid people or situation as much we avoid ourselves. Our addictions to gadgets, televisions, Twitter, Facebook, all help us to avoid knowing who we really are. We are strangers to ourselves.

It is in such a scenario that the Psalms 46: 10 says “Be still, and know that I am God…”. For us who have lost the art of ‘being still’ is it a wonder that we feel God is too distant and far away. This is why sitting down and reading the Bible is such a herculean ordeal. It is boring. This is why praying is not easy. Prayer is a time when we become aware of the thoughts that bother us. Prayer is the time when we become aware of our anxieties. It is uncomfortable. Prayer is not just an endless litany of our needs. It is also a time to open ourselves to listen to the voice of God that says “Be Still, and Know that I am God..” It is a time of knowing ourselves. It is the moment of surrender where we tell God “Take me as I am.” It is a time where we set apart the mask that we carry around. It is the moment where we are aware of our vulnerabilities and woundedness. Herman Hesse says “We hate in others what we hate in ourselves the most.” When we see the trait in others that we dislike in ourselves, we transfer our hate to others. We have found a scapegoat. We will keep running away from ourselves. Prayer is the time where we become available to God and ourselves. As a child I remember a story that has left a deep impact on me. This story I heard when I was in the Standard 3. So it is adapted according to the way I interpreted the story as a child. “There was a boy called Jim. It was his practice to come back from school and go to the nearby chapel and pray. He did this very regularly. The sexton of the Chapel noticed this boy coming every day after school to the Chapel. He was pleased to see the devotion of the boy. But he also noticed that Jim just spent 10 seconds at the Chapel. The sexton thought of confronting the boy on the duration of time he spends in prayer. Next day Jim comes to the Chapel. He kneels down and after 10 seconds he was on his legs. At the door he had the Sexton waiting for him. “Hello sonny”. Jim smiled back. Sexton continued “I see you come everyday to the Chapel. Very good. But I see you pray just for 10 seconds. That is not very good. Don’t you have more time for the Lord?” Jim smiled and replied “Uncle, I do not know any long prayer. I come here and surrender myself to the Lord by praying ‘Jesus, this is Jim.’” The sexton did not know what to say after listening to Jim. Days after Jim continued coming to the chapel to pray. One day when he was on his way back, Jim met with an accident where he suffered from a head injury and fracture in the right leg. He was admitted in the hospital. One day when the doctor came for rounds he asked the Nurse “Two days back when I came for rounds, everyone around was blaming us and cursing. The mood here was very heavy. But now I see smile on the peoples face in this ward. What exactly happened?” The Nurse replied “Ever since the boy Jim came to the hospital, everyone just sees smile on his face. He has a head injury and a fracture. But still he keeps smiling and his smile has become infectious.” The Doctor approached Jim “My boy I am happy to see you. But I wonder with the pain that you have how do you manage to smile?” Jim replies “Doctor, everyday I pray to my Jesus saying ‘Jesus, this is Jim.’ In my hour of pain, in the time when I am alone I can hear Jesus saying to me ‘Jim, this is Jesus.’

We live as if everything will remain as it is now. But we 'will' face sickness. We 'will' get old. We 'will' lose all things of 'doing' that define us today; our job, our beauty and our possessions. Then we will be left only with ourselves. But we dread ourselves. It is time we surrender our fears in prayer. It is time we come as we are in front of our God in prayer.  Let us discern the presence of God. Let us ‘Be Still’ and Know that He is God. 

Rev Merin Mathew

Mar Thoma Syrian Church

Guwahati