Text: Matthew 5: 21-26
“You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder,[a] and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’[d] is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell. “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift. “Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still together on the way, or your adversary may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. Truly I tell you, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny.”
Message
In Greek, there are several words for anger to choose from. The word used here for anger is not Thymos. This is an anger that flares up toward a person for something they have done, but fades and goes away.Someone comes into the room, talking loudly while you are trying to hear something on television...the anger flares up and you yell “Shut up!” That is Thymos anger. It flares up, but you won’t hold on to it for long. Jesus is also not talking about the anger at a situation or injustice. You see something wrong around you and it makes you angry.
The anger Jesus is describing is relational in nature, it’s a deep anger towards a person. Jesus uses a very specific word for anger that means a brooding, simmering anger. This is the anger we hold on to, nurture, feed and lovingly care for, because we want to be angry at the person.And it is this anger that leads us to say “Raca” or “You fool!” to our brothers or sisters. This anger is rooted when our ego is offended. This anger leads to severing of communication with the particular person. It further leads us to gossip about this person to others by assassinating his/ her character. When we harbor this kind of anger it affects our relationships with others, and therefore affects our relationship with God. This was the Kind of anger Cain had towards Abel which eventually lead him to murder his brother.Jesus here is making very clear about the anger that distances us from our fellow human beings.
Let me illustrate this with a story that is very popular on Facebook for all the right reason.
A Hindu saint and his disciples were visiting the Ganges river, where they found a group of family members on the banks shouting in anger at each other. Turning to his disciples, the saint smiled and asked, ‘Why do people in anger shout at each other?’
His disciples thought for a while. One of them finally said, ‘Because when we lose our calm, we shout.’
‘But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you?’ countered the saint. ‘You can just as well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner.’ His disciples thought about it some more, but could not come up with a satisfactory answer. Finally the saint explained,
‘When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other, in order to cover that great distance.
But what happens when two people fall in love? They don’t shout at each other but instead talk very softly because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is either nonexistent or very small. And when they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only need to look at each other and that’s all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.
So when you argue, do not let your hearts get distant, do not say words that distance each other more, or else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.’
Jesus further says, “if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.
The people who heard Jesus must have felt this as a crazy talk. For the people used to walk for 4 days and nights to reach Jerusalem from Galilee to offer their gifts at the Jerusalem temple. So to them jesus is asking to walk back to their hometown, reconcile with their brothers and sisters and then walk again back to Jerusalem to offer their gifts on the Altar. Also note that It is not that whether you have anything against your brother or sister but if they have anything against you, you need to take up this journey. Let us be very aware that Jesus lived in a time where honour was given prime importance. In this context Jesus is asking to swallow our pride and honour to reconcile. The emphasis of Jesus is that no price is too high when one considers the joy of restoration of relationship.
Today we live in a time where we all have fragile egos. We all live by guarding our honour. And the moment we feel offended or we offend people we deem it unnecessary to reconcile. The mantra we live by is “If anybody has a problem with me. Too bad. It is his/her problem. Not mine.” Therefore our relations today have become distant and beyond repair.
The great Lent starts with a Service called the “Shubhkono” which means reconciliation. In this we have a liturgy where the Priest asks forgiveness to the Parish members and the parish members ask forgiveness to the Priest and fellow members. This is then followed by the Kiss of peace. Our focus generally during lent is about abstinence from food. This is important. But the main focus is to get our relation right with Our God and to be reconciled to our brothers and sisters.
Let us ask ourselves if we have hurt somebody with our words, actions or deeds. Have we been so angry with someone that our hearts have grown too distant? In this time of lent remember God demands that we reconcile ourselves with people who we have distanced.
The year before last, I had a major misunderstanding with one of my college time friends. We were the best of friends but had different point of views. Once when I wrote something favoring the struggle of northeast, he called me a traitor. He said that I did not value the sacrifice of army men. We got into a very terrible argument. We decided never to talk to each other. For a year we did not communicate. I was not ready to reconcile. The truth is even I had hurt him. It hurt me that our friendship evaporated in a fit of anger. The anger had distanced us. But after a year I started calling him never to get a response. I left many messages that showed I was ready to resolve. Last December he finally called and we laughed at our stupidity. I cannot express my joy. No grudge is worth nurturing. From experience now I know there is no greater joy than reconciliation. I am fully aware it is not easy but Jesus says that no cost is too costly for the restoration of relationships.
Brothers and sisters reading this, may I ask you, if there is anyone you have wronged or are angry with, to take the first step towards reconciliation. Lent is the time to put relationships in perspective. May God grant us the magnanimity to ask for forgiveness and the openness of heart to forgive. Amen.
Rev Merin Mathew
Mar Thoma Syrian Church
Guwahati
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